An Evening With Mike & Mike in the Morning

Given that ESPN Radio Hosts Mike Greenberg & Mike Golic (Mike & Mike in the Morning) are setting off on tour in support of their new book, I thought I would share my experience attending the last book tour they went on and what happened that night.

To do this, we need to wind the clock back 4 years.

The year is 2006 and it is late March. The NCAA tournament is in full swing and the countdown to my wedding is on. Being an avid listener of Mike & Mike in the Morning, I find out that Mike Greenberg is doing a book tour in support of his then new book Why my Wife Thinks I’m an Idiot and will be in Georgetown for a book signing. I thought this would be a really fun thing for my wife-to-be and I to do. We could meet these radio hosts that I looked up to and it would just be a fun night on the town…I even had a joke prepared to tell “Greenie” when I got to the front of the line that I knew would be a home run.

More background: In the fall of 2005, Mike & Mike ran a promotion called the “40-yard-blitz” wherein they would show a key word during a college football game broadcast. Fans could then enter the key word on a website through ESPN and if the word was correct, they’d be entered in a daily contest to win a 42” flat screen TV. Admittedly, I was obsessed with this contest and I wanted to win the TV. What better way to start off my marriage than with a brand-new TV? Melanie as not as thrilled with the contest and it reached a bit of a tipping point when we (read: I) halted a Friday night date night to watch an Army/Iowa St. football game to get the key word. That’s Army and Iowa St….

So, I purchased the book and off we went to meet Mike & Mike in Georgetown. (Here is where I need to digress once again). Georgetown is a place that I don't like going. If there is a hell, and I have the unfortunate fate of having to go there, I’m confident that I will have to cross the Key Bridge to get there. It’s crowded, always busy, drivers stop in the middle of the road for no reason, delivery and moving trucks block lanes of traffic for hours at a time, pedestrians wander out in the middle of the road for no apparent reason (the crosswalk just doesn’t do it for them). Bottom line…I am not a fan of going into Georgetown…but I made the sacrifice so I could meet Mike & Mike and have a nice evening out with Melanie.

When we got to Barnes & Noble, there was a long line. We got there in the last hour or so of the signing and were some of the last ones to make it. As we waited patiently for our turn the excitement was building. Here were these two guys I enjoyed listening to and really looked up to. It was exciting to get to meet them.

Just as I was about to get my turn, something happened. Greenberg’s face went completely blank. It was as though he had seen a ghost. The person in front of us was a woman in her late 30s/early 40s and she had Greenberg in a complete trance. She apparently was someone he had gone to high school with (or perhaps college) and was someone he had clearly had some affection for many years earlier. After what seemed to be a few long moments, he shook her son’s hand and gave her a hug. He said goodbye and as I approached his eyes remained locked on his blast from the past.

Finally, it was my turn. I had my 40-yard-blitz joke all lined up and I was ready to go! As I set my book down to be signed, he remained in a haze. I said, “everything alright?” Finally, he was able to shake the cobwebs off enough to address me. He said, “Everything is fine, she’s just someone who I used to know very well and think very highly of.” He then asked me my name, (still stunned at what had just happened and not completely paying attention). As I gave it to him and introduced him to Melanie, I fired up my joke; “Yep almost lost her to the 40-Yard-Blitz.” (A clear joke about focusing on winning the contest and not going on dates with her). He responded, “What does that mean?” I explained that we were engaged, but I spent so much time focusing on trying to win the contest that I was worried she wouldn’t stick it out with me. He didn’t get it. “Well, you said you’re getting married…congratulations and best of luck to you.” He shook my hand and sent me on my way.

As I walked out with Melanie by my side, we stopped to get a quick autograph from Golic. He was on the phone and looked tired of being there. (Understandable, not his book) Not quite the experience I thought it was going to be when I planned it. I don’t exactly know what I was expecting, but whatever it was, that wasn’t that.

I guess the moral of the story here is; if you plan on attending a Mike & Mike book signing, you might want to get to know the people next to you in line and move up or back a few slots if you find yourself next to a lost love of one of the hosts. Otherwise, you may wind up like I did, just as dazed and confused as Greenie and wondering what just happened.